Banks grows up.

You had to know this was coming. There is only so much time that one can try to regularly create throwback blog posts reminiscent of the better times. The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.

This show is partially responsible for who I am today, an its influence on culture cannot be argued. I have never met a person who did not know the lyrics to the opening song, and/or sang it on a yellow school bus on the way to a class field trip simultaneously harassing as many trucks as possible with the obnoxious yet rigorous "air pull" performed to force a honk. The result...ecstatic joy.

But this...my friends, is not a blog solely about the show. Its about a single character. And its not Will Smith, he gets way too much press on his own (he doesn't need my blog to hype him up). Its about the adorable co-co-star, Tatyana Ali. " ASHLEY BANKS. Actress" and "singer," she is back on the scene with a new show. Dont ask me what the show is called....but what I do know about, is the hot new spread of the upcoming issue of King magazine and the sexy spread she is in....

King

I guess this Throwback Thursday is more for me.....

But, for all of our recollection. I classically think of her as looking like this. But she is also known for this little piece of magic that I may or may not have had the double sided cassette tape to in the early 90s

.

yea...that's the 90s alright. lol

Ok, im off....

PS Ali went to Harvard (the rich man's community college where everyone graduates with honors). As a Boston collegiate alum myself, I heard through a friend of a friend that she was a big weed head in college. Like never went to class, but smoked all day weed head--as if there are any other type...lol. Just thought I'd share.

just like umbrellas.

its not often that i can find a celeb nip slip with clothing on. But rhianna is of a special breed and has pulled it off well. 

Cha ching. You can thank me later.

rappers delight.

im sure that everyone has atleast heard about the controversial song by rapper Ludacrs that hails Obama as the next president but simultaneously slanders the names of Hillary Clinton, Bush and McCain. Its some pretty heavy stuff. While some may ask "what the f*ck was Ludacris thinking," others literally blame Obama for the song. 

::Cough:: FOX ::Cough::

So, Sean Hannity & Co... basically...you are saying that Obama emailed Ludacris the lyrics to that song? Or are you saying that the next political leader should not endorse a rapper or in anyway shape or form have dealings with the hip-hop culture? No, no, I get it now...I think your trying to say that Obama should be a psychic and/or be able to time travel into the future to so he can pick and choose his associates before hand by their future actions.

Come on now. This is just shameful.

VIA: Nah Right

gay nike ads.

Some more ads pulled for being too homo-erotic.

Nike Hyper Dunks.

Wieden + Kennedy tried to fight the good fight and argue about the insight and the tone of the lines...which are pretty awesome. Im am positive that I have used the phrase "That aint right" back in my ballin days (really, really, really long time ago).

Why is the public so hypersensitive? Apparently the crotch in the face had some negative reactions. And while Ive never been dunked on per se(my D is tight..."D" is slang for defense...tight is slang for very good) I personaly would not like the feeling of peepee in/on my face. But thats what happens. And if your really lucky, the dunker "might" be wearing some underwear. Might.

Anyway...its blows that a good campaign got nixxed over a chosen art direction execution. Especially a good one. 

More executions here.

Sad.

VIA adfreak

Oh Man....Awesome Snickers Ad.

ummm, this snickers spot was pulled from the air in London for being kinda gay (gay in london...thats like a double entandre isnt it). Which came first, the chicken or the egg? I kid. I kid.  

I cannot...for the life of me, understand why they would take this brilliance off air.


Snickers..."Get Some Nuts." Oh man... Im also glad to see Mr. T back in action...full of puns and armed with pity.

Agency: AMV BBDO (London)

unfortunate head placement.

Parents Magazine...or reading material for an underground sex ring of sorts?

Hmmmmmm.....

Spazz. N.E.R.D.

political opinions that would cause you to back away slowly.

John Voight, the estranged father of Angelina Jolie, star (and i use that term loosely) of National Treasure 1 & 2 has some opinions on Obama. Socialism. And...Vietnam.

Prepare yourself.

"Sen. Barack Obama has grown up with the teaching of very angry, militant white and black people: the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, Louis Farrakhan, William Ayers and Rev. Michael Pfleger...We know too well that we become like them, and Mr. Obama will run this country in their mindset...

...The Democratic Party, in its quest for power, has managed a propaganda campaign with subliminal messages, creating a God-like figure in a man who falls short in every way. It seems to me that if Mr. Obama wins the presidential election, then Messrs. Farrakhan, Wright, Ayers and Pfleger will gain power for their need to demoralize this country and help create a socialist America...

...The Democrats have targeted young people, knowing how easy it is to bring forth whatever is needed to program their minds. I know this process well. I was caught up in the hysteria during the Vietnam era, which was brought about through Marxist propaganda underlying the so-called peace movement. The radicals of that era were successful in giving the communists power to bring forth the killing fields and slaughter 2.5 million people in Cambodia and South Vietnam...

...This is a perilous time, and more than ever, the world needs a united and strong America. If, God forbid, we live to see Mr. Obama president, we will live through a socialist era that America has not seen before, and our country will be weakened in every way."

Who let this man out of his facility? He clearly got loose.

Whole article here.

dog ads.

I dont know how I feel about this. At first glance, I think..."genius," but when I think about it...it dont know if it makes a whole lot of sense. 

"Seeing Eye Dogs Make it Clear." I get that. But whats with the lack of a line? Granted, blind people wont see it...but then again they wont see the bus shelter either. So a blind man's friends sees it...but what do other seeing eye dogs companies do? Dont all seeing eye dogs go through the same training? Maybe I dont understand the client well enough....but thats what a line is for.

I dunno. It is visually striking. And that's why I like it. But what is it really saying? I dunno...I feel like I just lost a couple of brain cells trying to overthink this.

Anyway...back to stock photography searching....

Agency: UbachsWisbrun JWT, Amsterdam

VIA: ibelieveinadvertising.com

"officer, you stepped infront of my bike."

While some NY cops get away with murder on a daily basis, others get caught doing mild acts of violence by a video phone and have it posted all over youtube. 

thank god  the NYPD has those new subway ads. 

Very convincing. 

homicide. in the 4th degree.

Just incase you were wondering....yes, it is legal to threaten someone's life. Artistically speaking. In Poland.

Peter Fuss.

amnesiac fashion.

ok kids, I've been busy, busy busy. Learning "the ropes"- thats ad office vernacular for getting b*tch slapped graciously. Im learning that as an AD people either like what you have, or they dont. As a junior AD, Im learning that you get stuck with the grunt photoshop work and image searching gig (hell on earth-i promise an entire post to this). And Im learning agency office dynamics....people's toes that need to be avoided. But I literally just walked in my door at 9:30pm. Take that for all its worth. And I started my week with a crappy cup of coffee...yeah...bad news all around....

but a quick post to show that Im living. Found this on steel closet. For all you who dont have years of catholic school burned into your cerebral cortex.I'm still looking to catch Sister Mary Joseph on the streets...I have a few choice words for her. 

Enjoy.

Colours. The Muse of grass.

ummmmm. Cool. Outrageous. Lovers. Of Uniquely. Raw. Style.

::head cock to the side::
Am I really suppose to take this seriously? Bently is in it. He use to carry the umbrellas for Puff Daddy. He also has a show now too. I just dont know if I should support this....whatever, Kanye, Andre 3000 and Bently...I guess, are so unique...they've made a sudo group (im not too into things like this either....are you a solo artist, or are you a group?). I feel like they were in the V.I.P. section of club somewhere passing a dutch (filled with...) around, and they came up with a clever name after a few hits, a conversation consisting of White Castle and maybe some Hennesey was involved. And they were like, "yo, we need to make a song."

Call me old fashioned...but I like my artist a bit more tailored, and not just a conglomeration of some side thought discovered while debating the merits of a short stack as oppose to the silver dollars at IHOP.

And for such lovers of uniquely raw style, the video sure was boring. 

Whap. Whap.

on being "hood".

‘I think it’s more important for me to be in touch with who I am than in touch with the streets, per se... Being in touch with the streets, keeping it real, that’s become a lie and a cliche. I’m not hanging on the corner in the Bed-Stuy. I hate it when rappers say, “I’m keeping it ‘hood.” I’m like, “Why? What do you mean? No one’s there by choice! You’re in the hood, by choice?”‘
-Jay Z


All valid points. But the real question lies in his "choice" of clothing. He literally looks like a hobo.

Disturbia. Rihanna.

i would love to hate her. But she puts out hits. Rihanna.Someone is making her alot of money. And this is a fun video.

new york advertising.

there's a free mattress in the east village. with a stain. if your interested. this...is what I call guerrilla marketing. 

precarious and urgent...is the need for a geography lesson.

I was going to ignore this...I swear I was. I dont want this blog to be a battle ground for political "which side are you for" warfare. But after I saw the video...I just had to post.

"Iraq-Pakistan border". Ewwww, oh yeah and then there's Iran. 

Now, I dont know that much about the geography of the middle east myself...but I think there are a few fundamental differences between Mccain and I.

1. I am not running for President of a nation.

2. In an interview....I wouldn't ever bring up a country's "name", let alone their borders... unless a map was right infront of me.

3. The word "precarious" would not blow my mind in regular conversation.

Im just saying...

via animalny

a few rules.

after being verbally assaulted by a copywriter that i have never met before with enough rage pent up to fill a twleve pack of trojan condoms after his nightly online WOW tournaments, I feel it necessary to let you guys (especially the new readers) know what this blog is about. I would call it bylaws...but thats not really the right word for it. Lets call it a safety warning shall we.

1. I am not taking the SATs nor am I writing my senior thesis paper when I sit down at my macbook to post a blog. I DO NOT need to impress anyone. With that said, you... my dear reader should not expect the genius literary styling of Hemmingway, TS Elliot or any other of the greats. If that bothers you...like, if the fact that I do not type out a full sentence to express my thoughts or capitalize when needed....bothers you...you may want to stop checking my blog everyday. Why dont I change? Because dear reader, we are not in high school anymore. I know the rules. And I dont have to prove that fact to you. Especially on a blog.

2. This is my blog. If you dont understand the way I write or the opinions I share, it's probably because you dont know me. And if you dont know me, there is no possible way you can judge me. If you need to express your anti thoughts about my blog posts, please write them in your journal at home. 

Dear Journal, 

Today I commented on someone eles's blog to show him  how cool I was and how much information I know. Im pretty sure I impressed his female readers with my wit and Shakespeare quotations. That always gets the ladies hot. And I think I won when I insulted his intelligence. I think I definitely put the nail in the coffin when I said I worked at a lot of agencies and I was better at advertising than he was. Yeah....that was good.::pist pump::

You see journal, blogging gives me that sense of security to talk sh*t from far far away that I never got in my small community college in the south. I may be back later to add another 500 word comment.We will see. In the mean time, Im gonna finish a few more rounds of Worlds of Witchcraft. Im about to save the elf princess.

 Luv, Douchbag McCoy. 

3. I do love comments. I do love opinions. However, what I love most, is my dignity. And I refuse to have that questioned in a forum such as internet blogging. If you are reading my blog, you should know that it is a pleasant mix of culture, stupidities, advertising, and news. Very little on this blog is about me or my personal life(for good reason). And if I do share my personal life...job, romantic, health, daily occurrences...its with the utmost sarcasm and entertainment that I can muster up at the time. If you are thinking that this blog in any way entitles you to judge me or even know the slightest thing about me, you (my dear copy writing friend) are a joke. This blog is not a forum for people to unload thier demeaning opinions (especially about yours truly). I will immediately ignore and delete them. 

I guess that's it. Im personally sad that I even had to take up a blog post with this nonsense.Its even more juvenile than that time I stole that pack of gushers from my best friend in 6th grade. And that exclamation mark image at the top right...vomit atrocious. This would've been an awesome place to putone of my infamous  nip slip posting. What a waste. 

This whole situation makes me feel like Kanye West. How lame.

And for the record, I love copywriters. its called sarcasm. 

Infact, I love everyone.  

Magic. Robin Thicke.

Awesome (i hope this one word sentence abides grammar rules).

Robin Thicke - Magic
by Robin-Thicke

truth in advertising.

this is kinda long...buts its funny. Agency life if everyone said what they were thinking. This is kinda for the ad people who read this. 

HOPE may be a little overated.

According to animalnewyork, Russel Simons (the mogul) has some type of "Art for Life" auction going on. Amongst other pieces he is selling a recreation of Shepard Farley's Obama HOPE work. 

The current bidding price is $108,000.

Now, you know Im down with Shepard Farley. And you know Im down with Obama. But if that is how much hope costs...Im all about dispair with a side of pessimism sprinkled with desperation. Please and thank you. 

In other Shepard news, these are tacky. When support goes too far.

angry black woman (men).

Omarosa (sp?) vs Wendy Williams (only know in NY radio show host)

One could ask why either of them are getting air time at all. Wendy Williams with a talk show? Hell has frozen over. And i am ice skating in it. In hockey blades...shredding some sh*t up.

attack of the living dead ads.

wrangler jeans (??cowboys??) has a new campaign strategy. its...cerebral. "It's about the animal spirit, the roughness, the instinct and the natural elements of the brand..."

did you catch it? the animal spirit? here is some print work chuck full of animal spirit to back the idea up.

You surely caught it that time right? If not...here is some more.

I mean...I get it. Demin for zombies. Or is it hippies tripping on acid, lost in the woods. No, no, no....its zombies.

Agency: FFL (Fred & Farid), France

"Your whole generation, you drink for the wrong reasons. My generation, we drink because it's good, because it feels better than unbuttoning your collar, because we deserve it. We drink because it's what men do."

-Mad Men ( season 1)

...the the addiction begins.

i mean...i like to run too Diddy.

like seriously...Im a bit of a runner myself. But if i ever get all doped up on the gatorade like diddy below...someone needs to shoot the horse while its down. Shoot me twice.

mo monsters, mo fun.

Hellboy 2. This will be brief. Did you see the first Hellboy? Did you find it sorely disappointing? So much potential wrapped into on concept...and it fell short. Well, Hellboy 2 is better than the first. There are definitely more monsters and some cool ass fighting scenes and...you heard it here first....killer elves.

Plot. During WW2 a baby monster was found whilst fighting Hitler. Awesome right? Well since the discovery of mystic forces, the US created a special secrete monster crime fighting team-Hell Boy of coarse leading the helm. Other notables...monster 1, monster 2, monster 3. Oh and Selma Blair...lesbian monster 4. So now, the secret crime fighting unit is out to the public. Followed with a plot of love, loss and redemption. Blah, blah, blah.

Pros. Like I said....killer fighting scenes. There is this warrior elf prince who is trying to assemble an ancient golden army.....yeah....i feel stupid just typing about it. But elves...are apparently nothing more than albinos with Beyonce weaves. Go figure.

Cons. Sophomoric humor. There was more than one time where I nodded my head in joke shame. Think...man with German accents says something the sounds like "shlong", Hellboy says "I wouldn't say that if I were you," and cue audience laugh. Horribleness.

All in all. Alright stuff. I'd suggest you wait for it to come out on DVD and spend your hard earned money on the Batman flick. Add to the kagillion of dollars it has already made.

i think i want obama to be my dad.

so you heard, mccain dared obama to go see the troops and obama did it(i wouldve used truth...but hey to each his own). But while in Iraq...Obama sinks a 3 pointer for troop moral.



mccain aint got nuthin on obama.

ok...back to making ads.

VIA animalny

me gusta.

These are gorgeous. The distressed type. The texture. The simplicity. I'm in love.

fffound.com

Mad Men.

alright, i am going to bed. But I wanted to hint you guys in on my new addiction. Mad Men. I'll tell you all about the last 5 hours of my life and how I may or may not have been sitting in the same place building a crush on a new tv series on advertising in the....60s i guess. Check the sweet opening credits.

innovative ads.

and by innovative, I mean costing a sh*t load of money, complicated and an eye sore. Not that i dislike it...but if they went this far they might as well have built a mechanical dinosaur too. That always draws the crowds.

Agency: Leo Burnett, Chicago

"... irony is insult with a smiling face." 

-Becoming Jane 

(dont u judge me)

1943-2008

even though I am not going to see the movie this week, I felt as if I should jump on the band wagon of "Dark Knight" frenzy. Below is a bit of a pathology (???) of batmans long career on screen. Apparently I jumped on the boat around Adam West's time. And oh do I miss him. Enjoy!

batty weekend.

I know that everyone and thier mom will be out trying to get into this movie this weekend. Its already getting rave reviews. And Im excited. However, I am not going to push my luck. And I want to avoid the crazies- you know the people who dress up for movies. Yeah. Im not in the mood. But if a few of my lovely readers do somehow find themselves in the midst of The Dark Knight...keep it to yourself.

chow and have a good one.

levi ads.

remember when levi had that "jump in your pants" viral thingy (which Maya was NOT a fan of). Well...here they go again. lieing to the public. Helium + levis = flying. One could ask "whats the point of this?". But its like viral and stuff.


Is it bad that throughout the entire spot, all i could think was "its gonna be a b*tch to get that duck tape off."

House of Cards. Radiohead.

not gonna fib...im a little hung over today. Also, Im turning into a radiohead fan.



cant wait to put my head on my pillow. its so loud in my office.

mccain supporters in soho new york?

wierd. 

P.S. Amazing layout aside, Hitler wishes he had the gusto that Obama has. 

via: Animalnewyork

porn/fashion ads.

holy moly, thats porn. 

Ive been ignoring all the rant and rave about the American Apparel ads sweeping the ad blog world. A story- about a year ago I was telling a co-worker that I needed v-neck tshirts and she suggested American Apparel. I then quickly informed her that I did not want a trendy deep v-neck shirt because I was not gay (no offense, but there is no reason why my belly button should be showing via my neck line when I'm fully clothed). But secretly, I pulled up the site later at my cubicle. 

What I discovered while looking at the site, was a thick air of

  dirtiness.  There was an ere feeling that overcame me and made me feel like I shouldn't be scanning the site at work. Not like the gap, BR, old navy....where I just felt like I am not doing work, at work. American Apparel made me feel like I was watching a snuff film. There was nothing appealing about the models or the cloths. They were trying a little too hard for that "real" look. All the models looked like they were just dragged out of bed at 3pm after a coke party on the upper east side. And now they have an STD. Whoopsi!

So I vowed to never shop in the store. And I ignored its presence and overtly sexual ads. But this right here...is porn... amateur porn. She is literally licking penis.

Porn.

Porn.

Porn.

Case closed.

via: Copyranter.

condom ads.

My thoughts when I first saw this spot:

- Where did they find all those black extras....this is so unrealistic. (then I figured out that Trust condoms are only for and from Kenya- which simultaneously explains all the black people and the lack of sean john and ecko gear.)

- Illllll, he pulled the condom out of the wrapping on national tv. I dont know about you, but Ive only experienced condoms unwrapped in intimate indoor settings- well scratch that indoor part.But If I saw one being pulled out on the street by a stranger...I would literally start running away. (then I figured out that Trust condoms are for and from Kenya- its probably a good thing to show Africans the look, feel and use of condoms.)

- The sound track sounds like a unsuccessful wannabe boy band. (then I figured out that Trust condoms are for and from Kenya- so I was probably dead on about my assumption.) 

You know after the first viewing that Americans dont have the guts to make stuff like this. But here are some others. Enjoy. 

For the Ladies: Or guys judging by the music.

Water Condoms: B*tch keeps dropping sh*t in the ocean.


VIA: Why Advertising Sucks.

just selling class.

This is considered fashion right? Cause its not in a porn mag right?

Giselle, I will buy two of whatever they sell in V.

f*ck it.

I dunno, sometimes fake ads are better than real ads. Here are some student made spots (supposedly) called "Suicide" and "Blow Job".

(ummm, Mariah Carey!)


vs.

thier current stuff. Share the Good.



I personally dont know the answer (well, I do...but I would like to know what others think). I actually still miss the good ole days. Dance!

I mean they are both certainly better than the Heineken Keg Spots (Im not even linking it to my blog). 

"Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired."

Edgar Bergen

iran knows how to use the clone tool?

Oh man...Im kind of late with this, but its too good to let slide. Its no secret that Iran is in a global "my penis is bigger than yours" contest. But instead of penises/peni (thats twice in one post), they have been showing off their artillery for the world to see. Even though it reminds me of fraternity, 55 dudes live in one house, im a better xbox player than you antics- I understand the need to literally show the world that you are on the same level as them and should be taken seriously. So a slightly undersighted western country perceived as a third world, why not take pictures of you missile testing and post them for American media? "Hey stupid Americans, I can blow things up too...".

The funny part is that apparently they photoshopped in another missile. There was originally 3. But American media ran pictures of 4. Why have 3 missiles, when you can portray empeding doom with 4? Why test 4 when you can save your money and test 3, and clone the 4th one in? Photoshop...in Iran. That's one word association I would never think to make in my life. Iran....Sand. Yes. Iran....Alladin. Yes. But Iran...CS2? 

  Before.

After.

This is an untapped resource people. Fake photoshopped PR fear. I would be worried, but its only decent photoshop work. Not great. Nice try Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Go set some type.

candy for cuties.

in the year 2000.



please note the rotary phone attached to that mans chest. I would rock the hell out of that. lol

UPDATE: I think the UK had it best, getting rid of cumbersom hands bags (ladies....).

sad.

i stole this from DListed. 

he made it a caption contest. I on the other hand am speechless. *but feel free to leave captions, if you want.

is this true?

actually, never mind. I dont need to know the truth. Its funny no matter what.

draw me a picture.

A nice little artist, designer, cartoonist. 

Shannon Bonatakis

a little satire never hurt anyone.

i remember sitting in my 11th grade Global History class reading about satire and its effects on said communities. I even remember the pop quiz that caught me off gaurd (luckily it was multiple choice and I also had a much better memory back then). And I always wondered why satire was such a big deal. Political humor....ho hum...bore.

The new New Yorker cover has totally tied up all loose ends I had on this issue. Oh boy is it causing a ruccus. And the funny thing is...its just targeted to the wrong audience. Obama dressed in Muslim garb. Michelle as a black panther with a crazed afro. And they are doing the extremist fist terrorist fist pump. I see the humor in it all. Its funny. 

However, for the average liberalist stay at home mom of the tristate area...its way way over their heads. And of course Obama wouldn't find it funny. McCain could give 2 sh*ts, but he has to stand against it to be considered a human being. I think of it like this...if the political funnies like Jon Stewart or Bill Mahr did something like this, it would be expected and admired to some point. But the New Yorker....no....wha...

It all has to do with the audience. And the New Yorker's readership is not the one. Its as simple as that.

VIA: Huffington Post

sex/furniture ads.

i would just like to say that I saw these ads well before the copyranter blog. I just don't type as fast, and my mind sometimes wanders. And I drink too much. But whatever. Here are some offensive, sexist ads. However, I do have a thing for silhouettes. So they made it through the blog cut. Sorry girls...and devote Christians.

Cause in the 60s there was a whole lotta unbridled sex induced by the crazy patterns and colors on the furniture. Get it? Or is it..... Whatever the case, lets just throw a gay couple in there. They'll be sure to fall for it. It is 2008 after all. Advertising at its best.

Advertising Agency: Ogilvy & Mather, Singapore