Who Cares, Britain?

Do you guys know who Susan Boyle is? Well apparently she is the hot sh*t this week. No matter when I tune into the tele news...someone is talking about her. Apparently she is some contestant who wowed the judges on Britains got Talent. She came on stage all fug ug and both the audience the judges (including Simone Cowell) where looking at her like she was a joke. Then she opened her mouth and wowed the audience. The media is treating her like some type of a miracle learning lesson. Just because you are ugly, doesn't mean you completely suck at everything you do...right?

My response, who the f*ck cares? 

Britain's Got Talent? Really? The only thing interesting about this story is that someone gave this stereotypical matronly British cat lady a make over. And by make over, I mean a burberry scarf and a leather jacket. Which means, it's about as interesting as anything they show on TLC (not including John & Kate Plus 8, that show is awesome). This lady is not. 

Once again...who the f*ck cares?

A Little Disheartening.

I will admit it. The video above weighs a little bit heavy on the heart .It claims that Disney has been copying and pasting their creative jeans...I mean genes for years. And it makes me a little sad.Those damn you tubers sitting around in there PJs on a Saturday night in their mom's basement editing old Disney films to kill the hopes and dreams of children around the world (instead of getting out there and making something original for themselves). But alas....I have a rebuttal. If you pay close attention, there are only a few films shown. All of them are old. And all of them are hand drawn.

Nerd alert...these films use to take 10 years to produce. They were hand drawn. So it is clear to me that if the cartoonist knew how to draw the movements necessary for a little Dosie Doe, he( I wouls say she, but it's def a he) might want to simply redo the dance drawing techniques used in the next movie that would also take a decade to produce. And hey...if it's not broken, why fix it? It was as simple as the times they lived in. So you must excuse me if i take offense to comment like: “Looks like the Disney Vault has a purpose after all - to keep us from realizing how similar our favorite classic Disney movies truly are. According to this video, Disney only ever made one movie, and they’ve been tracing it ever since.”

I just don't take kindly to uncreative people judging the talent and skill of those who are creative. It's like a judging Brady's throw when you have no arms. Dude, you can't even eat the doritos. YOU HAVE NO ARMS!!!!!

 It just doesn't sit well with me. And you know I have a heart string for Disney. Cha, don't even get me started....

a few rules.

after being verbally assaulted by a copywriter that i have never met before with enough rage pent up to fill a twleve pack of trojan condoms after his nightly online WOW tournaments, I feel it necessary to let you guys (especially the new readers) know what this blog is about. I would call it bylaws...but thats not really the right word for it. Lets call it a safety warning shall we.

1. I am not taking the SATs nor am I writing my senior thesis paper when I sit down at my macbook to post a blog. I DO NOT need to impress anyone. With that said, you... my dear reader should not expect the genius literary styling of Hemmingway, TS Elliot or any other of the greats. If that bothers you...like, if the fact that I do not type out a full sentence to express my thoughts or capitalize when needed....bothers you...you may want to stop checking my blog everyday. Why dont I change? Because dear reader, we are not in high school anymore. I know the rules. And I dont have to prove that fact to you. Especially on a blog.

2. This is my blog. If you dont understand the way I write or the opinions I share, it's probably because you dont know me. And if you dont know me, there is no possible way you can judge me. If you need to express your anti thoughts about my blog posts, please write them in your journal at home. 

Dear Journal, 

Today I commented on someone eles's blog to show him  how cool I was and how much information I know. Im pretty sure I impressed his female readers with my wit and Shakespeare quotations. That always gets the ladies hot. And I think I won when I insulted his intelligence. I think I definitely put the nail in the coffin when I said I worked at a lot of agencies and I was better at advertising than he was. Yeah....that was good.::pist pump::

You see journal, blogging gives me that sense of security to talk sh*t from far far away that I never got in my small community college in the south. I may be back later to add another 500 word comment.We will see. In the mean time, Im gonna finish a few more rounds of Worlds of Witchcraft. Im about to save the elf princess.

 Luv, Douchbag McCoy. 

3. I do love comments. I do love opinions. However, what I love most, is my dignity. And I refuse to have that questioned in a forum such as internet blogging. If you are reading my blog, you should know that it is a pleasant mix of culture, stupidities, advertising, and news. Very little on this blog is about me or my personal life(for good reason). And if I do share my personal life...job, romantic, health, daily occurrences...its with the utmost sarcasm and entertainment that I can muster up at the time. If you are thinking that this blog in any way entitles you to judge me or even know the slightest thing about me, you (my dear copy writing friend) are a joke. This blog is not a forum for people to unload thier demeaning opinions (especially about yours truly). I will immediately ignore and delete them. 

I guess that's it. Im personally sad that I even had to take up a blog post with this nonsense.Its even more juvenile than that time I stole that pack of gushers from my best friend in 6th grade. And that exclamation mark image at the top right...vomit atrocious. This would've been an awesome place to putone of my infamous  nip slip posting. What a waste. 

This whole situation makes me feel like Kanye West. How lame.

And for the record, I love copywriters. its called sarcasm. 

Infact, I love everyone.  

i hate this, this and that.

do you know what time it is? its time for the semi-not so daily rant and rave. I wish I had some crazy wild music and a camera panning in and out. Oh, and an overdressed game babe. Need one of those too.

1. Locker room antics. The idea of a communal showers (YMCA) has always creeped me out (you have to ask why they couldn't just put up a wall). Steam filled naked male comradery never made it into the top ten of my list of things to do (even when I played sports).....but since I have been going to the gym, I have gotten use to the "idea" of the locker room. However, I would like people to stop blatantly abusing the naked privileges. I understand the basic need to be naked and free, but please...lets not hold a convo while you are drying your private parts. And lets put an end to extended long periods of time standing around butt nekkid. They make the long towels to wrap around your waste..ssssoooo you dont have to share your goods with the world. This is not an episode of "highschool football team (generic)" , wrap it up grandpa.

2. I hate bank of america. They are just a bunch of scam artists. They say what ever they want to you over the phone just to get you to comply(sorta like Delta Airlines), and in the mean time they are sucking money away from you in fees. Overdraft fees are the devil, while over draft protection, is like a little evil elf that moves your money without your knowledge...and then charges you. Ugh...I am so tired of getting duped. I feel like im stuck in some terrorist regime and always getting shafted. Honestly, I would rather you beat me relentlessly to a bloody pulp than you continue to take my money and feed me nonsense.

3. I just cant get it off my shoulder...how Beyonce spoke blatant untruths about singers of the past, and gave undue homage to Tina Turner at the Grammys. She was just name dropping away...Lauren Hill, Aretha, Whitney, Diane Ross and she continued..."There is one legend who has the essence of all of those things: the glamour, the soul, the passion, the strength, the talent," Ladies and gentlemen. Stand on your feet and give it up for the queen."....the "queen" being Tina Turner. Now I coulda care less about the Aretha nonsense...but you cannot so lumping together some of the best voices and talents of our times and then have Tina Turner be the trump card. I love Tina. Love her for all of her 3 hit songs. Loved her in Mad Max and in Ike and Tina...How to Beat Your Wife. And I am not debating her queendom...she is a queen in her own right. But she is NOT the queen of singing and not the queen talent. Fin.

4. I'm done with Chicago and its snow. I get it Chicago. You "own this" when it comes to fucking up people's days. I just want to request...from one brotha to another (cause if Chicago was a person, he'd be a hip black guy with a neatly groomed goatee and a stylish vest) lets calm it down with the snow. The cold, I get...it's winter. But the snowing all the time has to come to an end. We are not in Alaska....and I am not equipped mentally for repeated days of snow. If I turn into a psycho killer, tis your fault.

5 There are a few things that everyone (in my opinion) should be in love with. They are: Puppies, Pizza, The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and the song "Umbrella" by Rihanna and Jay Z. If you currently do not like all of these, I would like to inform you that it is never too late to change. Quit your communist ways and come over to the light side. The right side.


Luv, Shaun