Everything You Need to know about John Mayer.

What he wants in a life partner: 
“The Joshua Tree of vaginas.”

What he wants right now:
 “All I want to do now is fuck the girls I’ve already fucked, because I can’t fathom explaining myself to somebody who can’t believe I’d be interested in them.”

On his sexuality:
 “I’ve never slept with a man. But I get it. I’ve seen pictures of men on the Internet that are sexier than pictures of most women.”

On his constant rejection by women: 
“Blowing me off is the new sucking me off!”

On his strange relationship with the paparazzi:
 “I have not had a woman appear in my dreams sexually without a paparazzi in the dream, too. I can’t even have a wet dream without having to explain to someone who’s grinding on me, ‘We can’t do this right now, because there’s a guy over there taking pictures.’”

Advice for Tiger Woods: 
“If Tiger Woods only knew when to jack off. It has a true market value, like gold bullion. I have masturbated myself out of serious problems in my life.”

John Mayer in a recent Rolling Stones interview. Ha ha. This guy is funny. Probably real douchy....but funny (or high). 

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