real world is code for.....

now, I will be the first to admit that I am, of the Real World watching generation. In the early 90s there was nothing, and I mean nothing on TV better than Real World. When I was in different cities, all I would think about was "where is the real world house?" I wanted to be on the show so bad, that i actually scheduled it into my life. High school, 2 years of college, REAL WORLD, last two years of college. I would have even went abroad, though I would despise being in a country that doesnt speak english as their first language. My plan to get on, was being a "black man who did not like black people." Fools proof right? Until Dave Chappelle, it was a true winner and a great conversation starter. Now I just stare at the floor when I meet new people.

Today, it is something of a new beast. And I realize that it is of waning interest to the youngings. In fact, i think it is us old heads who are keeping the whole franchise alive. And that is a hard task to put upon ones shoulders. Its been awhile since I have watched an entire season....I start out strong, but end up inevitably loosing interest in the characters (like I dont even remember who was in Australia.(I do remember Cohutta's country ass though, still think he is an actor). But I am still into the challenges...the Gaunlets and what not (though not truly abreast on some new players).

With that said MTV recently hosted its Real World Awards Bash. In which you the viewer (and myself) get to vote on. And this excites me. Its like the perfect nostalgia (videos, picture...you name it). Great for me. Not so great for the cast. Why? Because they ALL look like shit. Please view examples as follows:






























































I know what you are thinking......no one can look worse than Nathan who not only aged 10....thousand years and was recently attacked by an army of cold soars, or Tanya whose only job is to be a whore, but now she is fat, or Jon....who is 88, or Coral trying to cover her eighteen head with bangs, or Puck who looks like he contracted the HIV, or Eric who apparently just got back from a third world country after a bout of guerrilla warfare.

But its gets better.


















Matt from New Orleans takes the gold for being a fatty bobatty (best thing I could come up with--Aoife talk for FAT ASS).



Ohhhhhhhh man. So, my real world dream is officially over. There was a time when all one had to worry about was being stuck in the purgatory that was MTV challenges (BTW, did anyone catch the outcome of the Gauntlet 3?, I'll blog about it soon) or never being able to get a real job (not too different form my life now)....but now I have to worry about becoming ugly too!

Real World...no thank you.