30 years old and loving it.

I thought. It was suppose to be like- when I turn 30 and I am still single and alone....

Isn't that the cue for parents to start nagging you about being...single and alone? When they get that heroin itch for grand children and infant holiday shopping and knitting and all that.?Well...this man's mom seems to have missed the memo. That switch has flipped (in he rmind)and for the past 3 out of 4 conversations I have had the theme...and by theme I mean, blatant questions such as..."Did you find a nice girlfriend out there in chicago yet." is always, always asked. To which when I tell the truth, I get scorned and/or and met with a puzzled voice wondering why a young man quote..."wouldn't want company when they are lonely."

So, these conversations, by chance, have brought me to a few life conclusions.

1. All you early 20ers who are in these magnificent all endearing relationships...you're all f*ckers ruining the lives of single young non-professionals everywhere. If you are currently "living" with someone (or acting like you are living with someone) or even know the protocol for the purchasing of "rings"...or jibber jabbering about being the "one" or find him/her, then yes, I am speaking of you. Your arses (That's british) and you're currently ruining my life.

2. No matter how old you get, you are never too old to exaggerate and/or slightly alter the truth, when parents ask you certain things. Just when you thought you no longer had to mask that all night house party from your parents with a "bff sleep over," you definitely still have to press the omit when parents ask you about your friend's love life. The phrase "they'll probably get married" should never be uttered. You are sinking your own ship of singledom. Edit, is indeed the word of the day-otherwise you are jinxing yourself to a life of doom and gloom and comparison. 

3. Relationships are the new dream career. In this day in age, forget actually doing what you went to school to do. Forget, living a life when you love every minute of your life and job. Forget establishing yourself. Nope. We all must find the love of our lives before we hit a quarter of a decade. Mucho importante. Life is love, and love will keep you happy and then pay the bills.

What happened to the old fashion dating...hooking up in a bar, trying to kindle a relationship and letting it fall by the weigh side a few months later? Gosh. The Pressure is paramount.